


How the Turntables...

by sammibobami



Category: Naruto
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, F/M, M/M, Office AU, basically what happens when I watch the office for the hundredth time
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-06-08
Updated: 2018-09-17
Packaged: 2019-05-19 19:39:50
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,718
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14879951
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sammibobami/pseuds/sammibobami
Summary: Senju-Uchiha Paper is just your average paper company based out of Ohio. As most people would suspect, it's a declining industry. Mito Uzumaki, CFO, has decided to send Tobirama Senju to the somehow profiting Toledo branch. Madara Uchiha is less than pleased when Tobirama is shoved into his work life.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I love Naruto and I love The Office, so in my mind it made sense to combine the two.

“Why am I so happy? Ah, how can I explain it?” A smile split the tanned face of the man sitting before the camera, “It’s like when Santa Clause goes to live at Disneyland. Or is it Disneyworld? I always get the two mixed up. Anyway, it’s like when the best person in the world is coming to live at the best place in the world. My brother’s coming to work at my branch!”

“Everyone in the conference room! Everyone in!”  
“I don’t understand why we have to do this so early in the day. I have work I need to do you know,” Izuna grumped, shuffling into the room. “Why couldn’t you have done this during the meeting yesterday?”  
“You don’t understand,” Hashirama couldn’t stop grinning as he gestured at the door. He continued at Izuna’s annoyed look, “All will be revealed soon!”  
“A bit dramatic, don’t you think?” The next person to shuffle through the door was the HR rep, a lean woman with her hair pulled into a tight bun. Despite her scolding tone, Touka had a similar (if slightly smaller) smile on her face.  
“I can’t help it!” Hashirama did a final sweep of the room once Touka was through the door. His gleaming eyes landed on a man standing a few feet away. “Come on, Madara! I don’t know how much longer I can wait!”  
The dark-haired man crossed his arms and tried not to scowl to hard. “As your right-hand man I think you should have told me what this meeting is about.”  
“You’ll find out in like two minutes. Just, get in the conference room already.”  
With a final ‘hmf’ Madara walked past his best friend and slammed himself into a chair right next to the door.  
Hashirama closed the door and looked at his employees with such euphoria it was a wonder he didn’t explode. “I know some of you don’t want to be here this early,” a small glare was sent to Izuna, “but I have some really exciting news. Corporate thought that our branch could use a little extra help in our accounting department and they decided that the best person they could send is my brother, Tobirama.”

The camera zoomed in on the black car pulling into parking lot. It switched focus to the man who got out.  
“Right. Hashirama told me you were doing this. I guess it just slipped my mind,” Tobirama shifted the box in his hands, looking a little uncomfortable. He looked at the man standing beside the camera man. “So, is this something you do every day? Oh, that’s…cool, I guess.” His eyes darted from the camera to the interviewer one more time before shifting again, “I’m just going to go in now.”

“What!?!” Madara’s voice reached a new octave, causing Kagami, who was unluckily sitting next to Madara, to flinch.  
“Tobi’s coming to work here!” Hashirama started to bounce on his toes. “Isn’t it great!”  
“Wait, who is Tobimara?” Kagami stopped glaring and turned his attention to Hashirama.  
“Hah! He’s just the biggest jerk in the company!” Izuna said from the back of the room.  
“And here I thought that Madara held that title,” Touka said from the chair next to him.  
Madara whipped around to stare at Touka. “I didn’t even say anything,” he turned his attention back to the beaming Hashirama. “I thought he had some cushy job at corporate. Why would he come here?”  
“There’s an old saying, you know, ‘don’t look a gift horse in the mouth’. “  
“I know the saying you fool!”  
“Maybe he’s only going to be here for a short while. Why transfer here permanently when you can have a better job down in Columbus?” Izuna said.  
“While I agree it probably would be good to work at corporate,” Touka started, “Tobirama could have just stayed with me or Hashirama instead of getting his own place.”  
“He should have stayed with me either way!” whined Hashirama.  
“Why? Why? Why?”  
“Oh great! You broke my brother!”  
“I don’t see why we need someone new.”  
“You just don’t like meeting new people, Danzo.”  
“It’s not even like we have the space for someone new. All the desks are taken.”  
“Let’s just stick him in the farthest corner of the annex,” Madara suggested, looking around for nods of agreement.  
“You can’t put mood-killer-Tobirama Senju in the annex! That’s me and Touka’s special love space!” Everyone drew quite at Izuna’s exclamation. Touka turned a shade of crimson so red it rivaled Madara’s dress shirt. It was impossible to tell if the color was caused by embarrassment or anger, “It’s not like we do it when any of you are around. And, hey, sometimes you just have to work off a bit of steam after dealing with an upset customer.”

“I was transferred here to help with the workload. This branch has been doing better than expected and Mito thought my brother might need some help managing the growth,” Tobirama slipped into the elevator and quickly jabbed one of the buttons. “Sorry, there’s no more room in this one.” The doors slid shut with a soft mechanical whirl.  
A different camera filmed as the elevator doors opened on the second floor. Tobirama paused midway out of the elevator when he saw them. His frown deepened as he sidestepped them, “I don’t really think this is relevant to your documentary.”  
Tobirama shifted his grip to one arm to open the door. Absent mindedly he held it open for the crew following him. Another cameraman turned just in time to catch his confused expression at the empty front desk. His brows knit together as the phone started ringing and no one rushed to answer it. Glancing around the corner he saw that the entirety of the front office was also empty. Tobirama gently set his box down on couch next to the reception area. As he moved further into work space, he checked his watch. “Is there normally no one here at 9:23?”  
A chorus of groans drew Tobirama and the cameras’ attentions to the conference room.  
“That’s disgusting! Please tell me you haven’t done it in the rest of the office.”  
“Gross! Why would we want to do it in front of-“  
“IZUNA!!! THAT’S MORE THAN ENOUGH!”  
Tobirama stopped in the door. The entire staff was present, every one of them displaying various levels of embarrassment and disgust, apart from one Uchiha in the back of the room who looked entirely too proud of himself.  
Few heads turned from the pair in the back to Tobirama as he fully entered the room.  
“Well, fuck me.”  
"Kagami!"


	2. Chapter 2

“Well, that was entirely awkward.”  
“Nonsense! I think it went incredible,” Hashirama beamed at his younger brother sitting across from him. “I think most of them really liked you!”  
Tobirama let out a sigh and gentle rubbed his eyes before replying, “I suppose the Uchihas could have made a scene.”  
“Kagami really likes you and he’s an Uchiha! And I think you could get along great with both Madara and Izuna if you guys all spent some time and actually talked things out.”  
“There’s really nothing to talk through.”  
“But-“  
“Let’s change the subject,” Tobirama rested his elbows on his knees and leaned forward. “Is this normally how your office runs?”  
“Huh?”   
“I walked into the office and there was absolutely no one around. That meeting was an absolute train wreck turned joke. And, and this?” Tobirama gestured at the camera crew filming outside Hashirama’s office. “How is that part of conducive work environment?”  
“You don’t like the documentary crew? I think it’s going to be so much fun to look back over the years!”  
“Regardless, and please don’t take this the wrong way, how the hell are you doing it?”  
Hashirama stopped grinning at the camera, “Doing what?”  
“Somehow this is the only branch turning a profit. I’ve looked over the books of all four branches and this is the only branch that is not only green but is also growing.”  
“Well, what can I say?” Hashirama leaned back in his chair and let a smile creep over his face. “I have a great team.”

Izuna was busy glaring daggers at Tobirama through the blinds of Hashirama’s office while leaning against Madara’s desk. “What do you think he’s actually here for?”  
“I know you have a problem listening but Hashirama said he’s here to help run the office.”  
“No, I heard, but it just doesn’t make sense. Working in the accounting department here is like a step down. I think he’s gunning for the regional manager position,” Izuna continued to glare as Tobirama gesticulated. “And once that happens we’re out.”  
“I don’t think that’s quite it,” Madara stopped typing on his computer and swiveled his chair to face Izuna fully. “From the sounds of it, this is mainly to help Hashirama actually get a professional handle on things,” Madara smirked as he switched his gaze to Tobirama. “Besides, the regional manager needs a sales background and god knows Tobirama doesn’t have the personality to be a salesman.”  
Izuna heaved a massive sigh and rose from the desk. “Most people say the same thing about you.”  
“Don’t you need to be answer some call!”  
“Yeah, yeah. Just think about what I said,” Izuna started to walk away. “There’s more to this than just helping with management.”

“Izuna and Tobirama have always been at odds. Tobirama’s always been a bit of a dick and Izuna can kind of take things to an extreme,” Touka crossed one long leg over the other and shifted her weight to her left side. “God, you should have seen them when they were teenagers. Thank goodness I was away at college and missed most of that. Whatever you do, absolutely do not ask Izuna about his high school basketball game against Tobes. Unless you’re wasted. Or he’s wasted. As long as there’s alcohol involved it’s pretty funny.”  
“I would say that there’s about a 90% chance a fist fight will happen. It won’t be between Izuna and Tobirama though. Tobirama will look at Izuna funny and Madara will go off the rails. That’ll be fun for me. I haven’t used those forms since I first started here and two guys in the warehouse decided to go at it.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So. This has been sitting in written for well over a month but I wanted to make it longer but it was just not working out. On an opposite note, I have some minor and major plot points drafted out on index cards so it shouldn't be too hard for me to update a little more regularly.


End file.
